When Your Cup Is Running Low

The last time I sat down to write here, I was reflecting on reaching 350 sales on Etsy and everything that milestone represented.

I wrote about growth. About learning to see slower seasons differently. About recognizing how much has changed since I started this little business and how much I have changed right alongside it.

Apparently life decided I needed an opportunity to put some of that growth into practice.

The past couple of weeks have been a lot.

What was supposed to be a relatively simple trip turned into something completely unexpected. Plans changed. Then changed again. There were long drives, extra hotel stays, unexpected expenses, stressful phone calls, difficult situations, and a whole lot of figuring things out as we went.

I'm going to leave most of the details there because that isn't really what this entry is about.

Somewhere in the middle of all that chaos, there were beautiful moments too.

I got unexpected extra time with my son. I got to see the life he and his fiancée are building together. The wedding earrings I had hoped to show her in person had to be shown through pictures instead, but we still got to talk about them. My husband and I leaned on each other in ways that brought us closer.

And, because apparently my Etsy shop didn't get the memo that my life was temporarily falling apart, I even had orders coming in while all of this was happening.

There was good mixed into the hard.

But here's something I'm learning:

Finding the good doesn't mean pretending the hard wasn't hard.

I think sometimes we are so quick to turn difficult experiences into lessons that we forget we're allowed to simply admit that something took a lot out of us.

And this did.

I came home later than planned to work that had piled up, orders that needed attention, football responsibilities, business responsibilities, home responsibilities and all of the normal things that don't disappear just because life temporarily went sideways.

And I'm tired.

Not the kind of tired that one good night's sleep necessarily fixes, either.

It's that deeper kind of tired that comes from constantly thinking about what needs to happen next. Solving problems. Taking care of people. Remembering things. Answering messages. Meeting responsibilities. Trying to be present everywhere you're needed.

I was talking to my husband recently about how much football season takes out of me. I love being part of it. I've given years of my life to it because it matters to me.

But something can matter to you and still drain you.

That realization has been sitting with me.

We talk a lot about removing things from our lives that aren't good for us. Setting boundaries with people or situations that hurt us. Walking away from things that no longer serve us.

But what about the things we love?

What about our families, businesses, commitments, communities and responsibilities?

Those things can empty our cups too.

Your energy doesn't somehow know the difference between something you willingly give it to and something that takes it from you. Eventually, the cup still needs to be refilled.

Maybe that's where I am right now.

For a long time, I think I associated strength with continuing to push. If something needed to be done, I did it. If someone needed me, I figured it out. If plans fell apart, I made new ones.

And I am proud of the woman who can do those things.

But I'm also learning that strength isn't only measured by how much we can carry.

Sometimes strength is recognizing when we've carried enough.

I'm not writing this from the other side with some perfect lesson about how I've already restored my energy and everything feels wonderful again.

It doesn't.

I'm still catching up. I'm still tired. Football season is still happening. Work still needs to be done. Orders still need to be packed. Life is still moving.

Maybe the growth is simply that I'm noticing it.

I'm allowing myself to say, This has been a lot.

I'm allowing myself to sit down for a few minutes without mentally filling that space with the next thing I should be doing.

I'm reminding myself that rest doesn't have to be earned by reaching the bottom of the tank first.

And I'm trying to give myself the same care, patience and grace that I so naturally give to everyone else.

Maybe you're in a season like that too.

Maybe nothing is necessarily "wrong," but you're tired.

Maybe you're grateful for your life while simultaneously feeling overwhelmed by it.

Maybe you love the people and things requiring your energy—and you're realizing you don't have an unlimited supply to give.

Both things can be true.

You can be grateful and exhausted.

You can be strong and need rest

You can love something and admit that it takes a lot out of you.

And you don't have to wait until everything settles down to start pouring a little energy back into yourself.

Sometimes finding your spirit isn't about searching for something new.

Sometimes it's about getting quiet enough to realize you've been giving pieces of yourself away all week—and deciding it's time to save a little of that energy for you.

I think that's where I'm at right now.

Not giving up. Not falling apart.

Just tired.

And finally learning that maybe I don't need to apologize for that.

Thank you for spending a few minutes in my little corner of the world. Until next time... 💛

Find Your Spirit,

Kim